@glendass5
“I want someone who knows what they really want, that’s what I deserve.”- I said those words to the guy I was dating and I walked away. Now I’m the happiest I’ve ever been (: loving myself !
@hollaholla7246
I sat down a guy that I was dating for 3 months about what his intentions were and i didn’t want to waste time if he didn’t want to be w me. He said he wasn’t sure about being in a committed relationship and he felt like we moving too fast so I told him that since the new year is just around the corner, I want to start the year with feelings of joy and happiness. So If he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me then it’s ok. I want him to be happy too so my door is open for him to go out and figure it out. I will continue to date and find my happiness. Whenever he’s ready let’s just hope I’m still here. I gave him a week to think about it. Fast forward after a week he did come back and now we are in a committed relationship. So this does work if the guy really don’t want to lose you otherwise if he doesn’t, you’re actually doing yourself a huge favor by eliminating guys who are just gonna waste your time.
@claudiavalencia2322
The message is not for you to get the guy back. It's for you to earn your self respect and value.
@laurened6505
I asked him if he needed space. He said yes and added he does not think he can be a good partner to me. I walked away. Easiest breakup ever. No contact for 10 days and not planning to chase him. It hurt horrible the first 3 days but it is the most empowering thing I've done. Thanks Matthew for helping me keep dignity and self respect.
@Progress_Not_Perfection
If you love someone, let him go .... If he comes back, he's yours. If he doesn't, he never was ... ! ❤
@jessielabis3551
My situation 2 months ago. This is exactly what I did. He came back because he said he can’t afford to loss me. I asked him what he wants from me and he said “all of me” but of course I want action more than words. Thanks Matthew 🙌🏼
@Exotixa
I had to go through something like this. The underlying idea is that he doesn't want to pursue a future with you. You can be angry and all that you desire, but its okay at the end of the day. We all deserve someone who loves us completely, with no doubt.
@SynedocheofMyself
Basically said this to the “confused” man. He left anyways but I kept my self-respect. Wishing him the best - from afar.
@dellcroydon
So I struggled with how a guy was feeling towards me, we got on so well and then he became distant so I watched this video and repeated this. At the time it seemed like it failed, I read comments on here to check if it had worked for others but having said it, I failed to believe it. The guy said he didn’t want to walk away but having thought about what I had said, I was right and it was for the best. I felt an idiot for having followed this video because I thought I could have kept him around even if he was less interested, if I hadn’t of done that. After a few days, I missed him and speaking to him but I grew to really respect myself for walking away from something that gave me anxiety and made my head race with questions of what was I doing wrong. I would never have done this before, been confident in myself to be the one to walk away, I’d always think being extra kind would suddenly make them change their mind. I saw a new side to me, a new respect in myself and I thought even if I came away without something with this guy, I came away having learnt something and stronger as a person. Perhaps this was the lesson that was the reason he came into my life. Since then I got to talking to other guys and finding connections with other people. I would think about him now and again but told myself if it wasn’t meant to be, that’s because there’s someone else out there. With the ease of lockdown I was able to plan dates and met up with a guy on Saturday. We had a great date and I felt like it was nice to have that bit of added confidence to just be myself. The following day the guy text me and told me whilst he really loved the date, had a great time and found me really lovely, he just felt something was missing. I cried out of feeling like there won’t be anyone for me but I replied honestly and told him, you can’t like everyone and he shouldn’t apologise. I had a lovely time and whilst it was a shame he felt this way I respected his honesty and was lovely to have met him. He really respected this attitude and I don’t think I could have been so honest to myself and to him without having had the previous experience of walking away from that previous guy. Within half hour of this text from my date, the original guy he respected myself to walk away from - text me...after 6 weeks of not speaking. He said how he knows we decided to part ways but he wanted to tell me how I looked incredible in my profile picture. I replied with a closed message to say I hope he was well and we continued to send each other closed messages as if we were finishing the conversation to be polite. He went on to tell me he had genuinely missed me and had recently downloaded a dating app to only find it made him miss me more and he’d thought about me a lot. We finally decided to put what happened before behind us and start talking again. It feels nice to have had him text me after six weeks and that perhaps this video did work out for me. Perhaps having self respect and confidence in myself left him feeling like I’d made a mark on him. It’s only been a couple of days but I’m making a lot more of a conscious effort to be chilled and relaxed about things. Enjoy the moment and not think ahead. I wanted to leave this comment here because I know when I was searching for an answer of what to do, and then came across this video, I looked for feedback in the comments to give me hope it works. Even if it hadn’t of made him come back, it helped me to discover more of a self respect for myself and I do believe that you walk away on good terms that the other person will respect you too regardless of the outcome.
@vf8653
I did that after 2,5 years (we were in a "formal relationship", but he was never 100% sure of anything), a month later he was already dating another person... Some guys are just way too coward to take responsibility of their own feelings, the sooner you leave a doubtful one FOR GOOD, the better. Less waste of time and less self-esteem damage. I wouldn't bother on keeping doors open, most likely they would come back in panic mode (if they do at all), to do the same shortly after. It's just never going to work and you simply deserve better
@suzanneross6034
Just had to leave my boyfriend after 3 years of him being unsure . I deserve someone who is sure and he deserves to be happy too . . This video resonates with me so much . Thanks Matt
@iamhis4749
I used this saying today. My bf was acting all distant and pulling away from me. I love him and i genuinely want him to be happy, with or without me (preferably with me) but i was prepared for both outcomes. He was sort of half hearted in his responses and very defensive at first and he was saying that i didn't understand him.. etc I told him that i was trying to understand and then i said what you suggested in this video and it changed his whole view. It didn't take him weeks or months or year's. He literally changed soon after i said it and then all that love within him started pouring out. He knew that i genuinely wanted his happiness over all and that i also valued myself enough to let him go and honour myself and what i deserve at the same time. The change in him was huge. Thankyou Matthew, for the very helpful advice. Hopefully now, we can move forward and have a harmonious life together.
@xdxdxdxd4575
Once he pulled away it has a reason. He is not sure about you. Doesn't matter why. It can be because of multiple dating or anything else. The thing is just... he doesn't want a relationship with you! If you say that it gives him a privilledge to call you and be with you, when he feels alone or sorta and again... you hanging on a limbo. Or waiting for a commitment which never happens, becasuse he already knows that you always welcoming him in your life. Plus my experience from my emotions: If I do not stop and make it clear for him (and with it also towards myself) that "it is over" I start to think, that it is not over, and create an emotional limbo with it for myself as well.
@Cookingwithkryskrys
No amount of clever text messages will make a non interested man interested if HIS truth is that he's just not interested. You don't need to "coach" a man into wanting you. The interest is either enough or it isn't. If a man tells you he's unsure, do yourself a favor and be SURE in that moment that he's not the right man for you. Life is too short to wait or settle for the 1 man on earth that's not into you. Rejection hurts, but waiting is more torture bc you know deep down that your love story will never be that the man saw your worth the 1st round/time. Not all love will be a fairytale, but the least you can do is not settle for the "maybe" and "on hold" type 0f love. Waiting for someone to love you back is the most unkind thing one can do to themselves. Have the dignity, self esteem and self worth to only want who wants you and to walk away when you're left hanging by yourself.
@brendastahl7291
I’m actually doing this tonight. I had these words written out, much less succinctly, so many times. Hearing this again made me see it’s just so easy and available. The freedom to not be bound by every day in question - more than it would be with any secure and healthy relationship, has given me wings. I will certainly update on how it goes, but I also feel as if, in my situation, we’ve been together for almost 2 years. Kids on both sides (both single parents) and we both spend time with each other’s kids (me more than him, hence the need for this talk). Kids have met a few times - but aren’t bound by any means. The sheer slowness of it all and lack of true commitment has debilitated me - and we’ve done the timeline to decision thing before. It didn’t really go as I planned - after not leaving but giving a timeline, and then agreeing on things at the timeline, I still didn’t leave when there was no movement towards what we then had both agreed to. I feel like empowering him with a “I’ll give you _ to think about it,” just gives him more power and also I know he won’t abide by it. My one question - for those that did this, and saw positivity come from it in your relationship (I realize it’s positive for ourselves no matter what), what was your interaction with them during this “time to figure it out?” Did you completely no contact ? Did you just respond sometimes? I can’t imagine staying friends - as I know mine would likely settle into some weird non relationship friend with benefits routine. What did you do during the space regarding interacting with them???
@clarabow2479
Let’s face it, almost every man who says this already knows he doesn’t want you and any woman’s best plan is to just walk away. No bitterness or recriminations, just let him go. He was never meant for you.
@ValDokic
I’ve alwayssssss said this: “it’s not that they don’t want to be in a relationship. They just don’t want to be in one with YOU.” Hard pill to swallow but it’s so true! Men know when they want to be 100% in - shouldnt have to take convincing.
@fishcanon8141
To be honest, usually if this usually happens, no matter what you say, things won’t change. The only thing I agree about this video is that you shouldn’t beg or try to convince the other person to stay.
@priscylamello7149
I did allll you said in the video. Exactly like this. He sent more 5 messages in 3 months but none of them saying that he decided. The last time he did it, I blocked him.
@91clarie